2005-07-23 - 11:15 a.m.
I think the lack of communication is probably helping things out quite a bit, instead of being able to sit online like usual... I have to do other things, so it's bringing me out and into the community.
The community, what an interesting place, so much open love for everyone! It's very unique. Words and communication are very open here as well. We always talk about how we're feeling, and what's on our mind.
I would like her to come and visit I think, but.. I think maybe just right now, and at just this time might not be so good. I'm still I think looking back to the relationship that was there, and don't want to fall back into it. I need to work through some of that first I think.
I really don't think I'm going to find many other people here who are a part or interested in the BDSM scene. But I am learning alot of new things. From two different people right now, Staff Spinning, and I'm going to be learning Capoeira. I'm also really interested in Tai Chi again, and I'm working on getting some material, so that I can study the form I used to study.
Outside interests again! it's awesome! Perhaps my relationship with her and WoW was much to one tracked. Destructive almost even?
I hadn't had any other interests except for school and her in a long time. Now I find myyself rediscovering who I am. Refinding interests, finding new ones.
OOH! Capoeira and Fire spinning together, that would be damned cool to see if I could make it work!
I have spoken to her a few times. We are still good friends, that's very good.
So initially... this was to be a journal to her, about my thoughts and feelings concering our relationship and things like that. So I'm not sure where I'm going to go with this right now...
I'm going to have to think about that I think. I'm turning more gypsy/hippie every little bit I'm here. It's strange. I'll be the dark gypsy.. I still can't get past black! :p
*sighs* not sure what else to say right now...
What's this place like?
It's on a secluded section of coast along scenic Highway 1 in Big Sur California. The mountains are the youngest range in north america, that means little weathering, and very vertical cliffs.
The beaches are mostly rock, and very rough. The weather is cold, it gets up to about 80 during the day, and down to about 60 at night. Every day!
Esalen itself is really exciting, nude hot springs and pools. An open loving community. It's been very welcoming, I really feel like I'm a part of this community. Or atleast I'm getting there. Everyone it seems really wants to make me a part of it, and invite me in.
I've been smoking alot lately. Smoked a hookah all last night, very nice, and I've been getting stoned almost everynight since I got here. and drunk.
I get up at around 5:30 for work, and go to sleep at around 12:00 or 1:00. No rest for the wicked. I hang out with all my friends nude at the springs. We do nude gardening, which is a blast, but I got a sunburn on my butt, that sucked!
The kitchen is great, we do buffets, for around 250 for every meal. There's not alot of people, but there's enough. They need some help with some professional touches, and making things a little more professional.. and well... not so bland but it's good. We get most of our produce from the garden and farm on-site.
We alsways stop and do an attunement, where we stop and sit down and talk about things, and help and support each other.
I'm enjoying it here alot.. I kinda think.. at some point I'd like to come back.
I do kinda miss people right now though.
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